Archives: News

FORT WORTH – On Match Day, 60 medical students of the graduating class of the Anne Burnett Marion School of Medicine at Texas Christian University matched into medical residency programs throughout the United States. All students matched into recognized programs, including Mayo Clinic, Stanford, Vanderbilt, UCLA, Duke, to name a few.

READ MATCH DAY NEWS STORY

The National Resident Matching Program (NRMP) announces residency match results to all medical students in the United States at the same time on the third Friday in March. This year marked the largest Match in history with a record number of applicants who certified a rank order list, according to NRMP.

Here’s a sampling of where some of the Burnett School of Medicine at TCU graduates will be headed:

Sophie Wix

Hometown: Phoenix, Arizona

Program: Dermatology, University of Texas Southwestern Medical School – Dallas, Texas

Her specialty: “As soon as I started seeing patients in the hospital, I noticed that I was drawn towards some of the patients that had cutaneous manifestations of their complex internal disorders, and realized I really enjoyed studying the skin,” Wix said.

Her inspiration: Her late grandma, she called ‘Tutu,” always wanted to see her become a doctor. For 11 years, Wix has carried a book Tutu gave her as a reminder: “I would love to tell her, ‘I did it; we made it!’ ”

Her medical school experience: “I am so grateful that TCU gave me the opportunity to take a year between my third and fourth years to pursue my passion for studying melanoma.”

Sam Sayed

Hometown: Arlington, Texas

Program: Emergency Medicine, Mayo Clinic of Graduate Medical Education – Rochester, Minnesota

His specialty: “There’s just more to medicine than just helping people in their most trying times,” Sayed said. “At the end of the day, it can’t be about lip service when it comes to people. You need to learn your community before they even walk through the door.”

His inspiration: Sayed’s 16-year-old daughter got the honor of opening her dad’s Match Day envelope. She said: “I’m really proud of him.”

His medical school experience: “Navigating the challenges of a new curriculum was something was something that was very exciting to me,” Sayed said. “I am just so proud I could call myself a Horned Frog.”

Benjamin Jacobs

Hometown: Sioux Falls, South Dakota

Program: Obstetrics and Gynecology, Duke University Medical Center – Durham, North Carolina

His specialty: Jacobs matched at his No. 1 ranked program – Duke. He said the focus on empathy and communication at the Burnett School of Medicine was important to him because talking to patients is the “most common procedure you’ll perform.”  He said: “Our school really focuses on that and makes you stronger in building relationships with them, and trust with them.”

His inspiration: “I have all my family and friends, so I feel a lot of pressure, a lot of anxiety but I’m really excited for this moment and soak it in,” he said.

His medical school experience: “I wanted to see patients early and be able to be part of their care,” Jacobs said. “The early clinical experience at the medical school really gave me the opportunity to shine throughout my away rotations and become the best clinician I could be.”

Antonio Igbokidi

Hometown: Little Rock, Arkansas

Program: Psychiatry, UCLA Semel Institute for Neuroscience – Los Angeles, California

His specialty: “Psychiatry is important because oftentimes we’re dealing with things that we can’t see on the outside, and the stigmas that come with it,” Igbokidi said. “A psychiatrist figures out a way to heal your soul.”

His inspiration: “I recently lost my father,” Igbokidi said. Match Day is a moment to share with loved ones and it hits harder when you are missing family members, he said. “Recognizing that he’s still watching over me makes this a little more special for me.”

His medical school experience: The school really allowed me to be an innovator: “Somebody who could find creative ways to solve a problem. That’s what medicine is all about.” If we want to provide the best quality care for our patients, we must be creative, be intentional, and go that extra mile, he said.

Anne Shirley Hosleton

Hometown: Chattanooga, Tennessee

Program: Urology at the University of Tennessee College of Medicine – Chattanooga, Tennessee

Her specialty: It’s difficult to get into some programs, especially the ones that have few spots like Urology. “Urology residency spots are pretty small in general, most of them are 2 to 3 residents a year,” Hoselton said. “So, you just picture all these different futures you have at these different places.

Her inspiration: “My parents are both in medicine,” she said. “I really grew up seeing my parents being very faithful to their work and what they did. They did a lot of home calls, and I would see them practice medicine in a community setting.”

Her medical school experience: “I was really attracted to the Empathetic Scholars® curriculum…and the importance of the human connection.

The Burnett School of Medicine at TCU’s annual celebration of completed Scholarly Pursuit and Thesis (SPT) research projects has been named to honor a Fort Worth family for its generous philanthropic support.

The Esch Family SPT Research Summit will honor John, Grainger, and Gregor Esch, whose endowment gifts are providing annual support to this unique component of the Anne Burnett Marion School of Medicine at Texas Christian University curriculum. The family created the Mary G. Esch and Mary N. Esch Endowment Fund in 2021, in memory of wife and mother Mary Norwood Esch and mother and grandmother Mary Guinn Esch.

“Research in all areas of humanity is vital to the betterment of life; but none is more beneficial or needed than in the medical area,” John Esch said.

John and his two sons have enjoyed a close and passionate relationship with TCU for seven decades. John earned his TCU Economics degree in 1964, and with his wife, Mary, set down roots in Fort Worth that remain strong today. The family’s connection to TCU has also remained strong. While older son Grainger earned his degree from Duke, younger son Gregor earned his 1996 Journalism degree from TCU. A mutual love of athletics, music, and the arts has led the entire family to campus often through the years.

Like many in Fort Worth, the 2019 launch of a new medical school attracted the family’s attention and interest. “TCU has provided Fort Worth with an incredible asset and resource with the rapid development of a quality medical school. The coming physical location in the medical district will magnify the impact even further,” explained John. The value of conducting a four-year research project and thesis particularly caught their eye. “We have the greatest amount of respect for the dedication, perseverance, and discipline that research entails.”

Why did my wife’s alarm go off so early this weekend? Wait, it didn’t. It’s just Daylights Saving Time. Depending on perspective and mindset, this “Spring forward” can be experienced rather negatively and take a physical toll, or it can be exciting, energizing and life giving, more sun and warmer weather. How do you experience time change, especially in the Spring? Your perspective could make all the difference.

Statistically, about one-third of the world’s population participate in some form of daylight saving each year, and the data from this shift can be alarming – props to neuroscientist and sleep researcher and expert, Dr. Matthew Walker for bringing attention to these statistics. After the Springtime change when we lose an hour of sleep, that following week there is an increase in heart attacks, stroke, automobile accidents, more injuries at work, even suicide. In case you are wondering, when we gain an hour of sleep in the fall, those increases decrease; there are less heart attacks, accidents, and suicide. Sleep is so important for our health and wellbeing, so is our perspective on getting the sleep we need, at least in the short-term.

Ellen Langer, Harvard’s first tenured professor of psychology, has an incredibly interesting study on real and perceived short-term sleep loss and its impact on performance. Healthy subjects slept in a sleep lab overnight. They either had a clock that moved slowly and told them they only slept 5 hours when they slept 8 hours, or the clock moved quickly and indicated that they got 8 hours of sleep when they only slept for 5 hours. Then, they took a test of cognitive performance and were asked to subjectively rate their level of sleepiness. Can you guess what the researchers found? If you perceived that you got the sleep that you needed (8 hours), you perform better and you don’t feel sleepy. If you perceive that you didn’t get the sleep you needed (5 hours), you perform worse and you feel sleepy. This is remarkable! Even if you get the 8 hours of sleep your body needs, if you believe you got too little sleep you will feel and perform worse! As Stanford health psychologist Kelly McGonigal PhD teaches, “the effect you expect is the effect you get.”

Here’s the take-home: Sleep is essential for health and wellbeing. We absolutely need good – quantity and quality – sleep to be healthy, feel good, and perform at our best. And, at least in the short term, if we perceive that we are getting what we need, we can feel great and function at our best.

The solution to sleep in your lifestyle is not that you can just change your mindset and sleep as little as possible. The solution is to prioritize the sleep you need, and – emphasis on and – in the short-term, this week, give yourself a little more time to take care of yourself in all the little ways that make a significant difference in how you feel and function throughout the day. Pick out your outfit the night before, give yourself a few extra minutes in the morning to get ready for the day, have good food available and easily accessible, and go a bit easier on yourself as your circadian rhythms synch with the time change. Even if you’re a little short on sleep, you will be strong in mind, which will make you also strong in body.

In all reality, you might lose a bit of sleep this week, but if you take care of yourself and your needs and prepare with a little more intention for your upcoming days this week, you can shift your mindset from lack to plenty. And that mindset shift can lead to a better transition this Daylight Saving Time and to you feeling great and having a wonderful week.

Craig Keaton, PhD, LMSW

Burnett School of Medicine at TCU Director of Wellbeing

Ever feel trapped in a cycle of busyness and stress? It can feel so hard to “turn it off.” Trust me, I know. Having faced it in my life and the lives of many others, I’ve learned (and relearned) a few important things.

Our bodies and minds are rhythmic. We move between higher and lower energy and activity throughout the day. We all peak, and we all valley. This is natural and healthy. Breathe in. Breathe out. The cycle of life goes. To have our “up time,” we all, require “down time,” breaks, and rest, but we are absolutely bombarded with information, impositions, distractions, and activating stimuli.

We live in a world of what Professor Cal Newport calls, “solitude deprivation.” Solitude is best defined as “the freedom from input from other minds,” and it is accessible to us all throughout the day, every day. Empirically, it contributes to peace and rest, recovery and rejuvenation, inspiration, creativity, and problem solving, even enhanced self-worth.

Free yourself. Skip the podcast, resist the urge to scroll, close your computer, turn off email, silence your phone, and just be – after all, we are human beings not doings.

Curiously search where you can get solitude, how you feel when you do it, and how you transform with consistent practice.

In the midst of the chaos, solitude just might be the sanctuary you need to rest, recover, and be well.

Craig Keaton, PhD, LMSW

Burnett School of Medicine at TCU Director of Wellbeing

FORT WORTH – A group of observers entered an exam room where they witnessed a woman with bruising on her face who was holding a baby.

“It looked so real,” said one observer. “I felt so bad for her.  I wanted to ask if there was a way I could help you.”

The observation case was simulated, but the impact was real.   

The observers were TCU Silver Frogs who experienced how Anne Burnett Marion School of Medicine at Texas Christian University students learn about health care. 

The Clinical Skills and Simulation teams at Burnett School of Medicine at TCU hosted 20 Silver Frogs members, 50 and older, who come from different educational backgrounds and experiences and love to learn. The group got an inside look at how the medical school is training students to be Empathetic Scholars® and physicans of the future.  

The program began with Burnett School of Medicine faculty members,Adam Jennings, D.O., Executive Director for Simulation Education, Innovation and Research and Sandra Esparza, M.D., Director of Clinical Skills, giving the group an overview about the departments and answering questions.   

The Silver Frogs explored different medical stations that students use to train and witnessed patient/provider scenarios with standardized patients (SPs) who help give students real-life encounters along with feedback. They also tried on the Microsoft HoloLens® and  learned about the medical school’s  HoloAnatomy® curriculum.

The Silver Frogs loved the experiences, said Whitney Hall, Coordinator of Standardized Patient Education at Burnett School of Medicine.  

“It’s really cool that the Silver Frogs were able to experience what students experience with SPs in their first year of medical school,” Hall said. 

FORT WORTH – Medical students from the Anne Burnett Marion School of Medicine at Texas Christian University provided 100 care packages to unhoused residents in Fort Worth.

Alexis Higgins-Williams, MS-1 at Burnett School of Medicine at TCU, expressed how important service-learning is to embody the Empathetic Scholar® model. 

“That empathetic piece is really important,” Higgins-Williams said. By touching people’s lives even in a small way, it reminds us of why we chose medicine in the first place, she said.

The event was sponsored by Burnett School of Medicine at TCU’s chapter of the Student National Medical Association (SNMA), Street Medicine Student Interest Group (SIG), and the Office of Diversity, Equity and Inclusion. The event was held at Art of Living Fort Worth, which provides various resources to the East Lancaster corridor in Fort Worth and works with unhoused families and individuals. 

The event was a part of the Burnett School of Medicine SNMA chapter’s week of service-related events in the Dallas-Fort Worth area to celebrate Black History Month. 

“As medical students it’s kind of easy to stay in our bubble and just study and go to class, but I think it’s really important to get involved in our community especially our disenfranchised populations,” Higgins-Williams said. 

The care packages included essential items such as toiletries, underwear, socks, hand warmers, medical supplies, and food. Students were able to provide free health education and free health checks for unhoused residents with help from the Black Heart Association. 

A local barber also chipped in by giving free haircuts. 

“It gives me hope that we can make things better for these populations,” Higgins-Williams said. “I’m glad we’re shining a light on it and we’re able to give back to the community.” 

FORT WORTH – The road to becoming a physician is partly learning to go the distance, and for many medical students it can feel like running a marathon.

For Carter Clatterbuck, a third-year medical student at Anne Burnett Marion School of Medicine at Texas Christian University, her medical school journey includes running a marathon – with her physician mentor.  

Clatterbuck has been training side-by-side with her Longitudinal Integrated Clerkship (LIC) preceptor Jamie Erwin, M.D., assistant professor at Burnett School of Medicine at TCU.

“It’s really great to be able to share something together outside of medicine and build that relationship in a different setting,” Clatterbuck said.  

The pair participated in the 2024 Cowtown Marathon half marathon hoping to outdo their personal best records and continue to cultivate their teacher-scholar mentorship. “I want her to see that you can be an OB-GYN. You can be a woman in leadership. You can be a partner. You can be a mother and you can be an athlete,” Dr. Erwin said. 

The mentoring began long before Clatterbuck was running trails around Fort Worth or seeing patients with Dr. Erwin at Andrews Women’s Hospital at Baylor, Scott & White All Saints Medical Center – Fort Worth as a medical student.  

In 2017, Dr. Erwin was invited to speak to the Zeta Tau Alpha Gamma Psi Chapter at TCU about women’s health. Clatterbuck was a sophomore majoring in pre-med at TCU at the time. At the end of the chapter meeting, she introduced herself to Dr. Erwin and asked if she could shadow her at her clinic.  

“I’m really lucky she said yes,” Clatterbuck said.  

From the beginning, Dr. Erwin was impressed with Clatterbuck’s initiative and drive. Between her sophomore and senior year, she shadowed Dr. Erwin frequently and when Clatterbuck applied for medical school, Dr. Erwin wrote her a letter of recommendation.   

“I was thrilled to know she got in and would be in Fort Worth for four more years,” Dr. Erwin said.  

Clatterbuck began medical school at the Burnett School of Medicine at TCU in 2021. Shortly after, Dr. Erwin became a faculty member at the medical school, but it would be a while before the two reconnected.  

At medical school, Clatterbuck began the Burnett School of Medicine’s LIC curriculum.  

In Phase 1 of the curriculum, students get clinical experiences alongside a primary care preceptor for 21 weeks. During Phase 2, the LIC experience begins with 10 weeks of inpatient hospital immersions and 40 clinical weeks of ambulatory LIC rotations in eight clinical disciplines (Emergency Medicine, Family Medicine, Obstetrics & Gynecology, Neurology, Pediatrics, Psychiatry, and Surgery).  

“It’s been really wonderful to have a longitudinal clerkship,” Clatterbuck said. “I was able to meet patients at the beginning of my rotation from their pregnancies to their deliveries.”  

In her spare time as a TCU undergraduate, Clatterbuck ran marathons. She decided to sign up for the up for the Cowtown Marathon’s Trailblazers Training Program in Spring 2023 hoping to improve her best personal record of 1 hour and 59 minutes in a half marathon.  

In the middle of a warmup session, Clatterbuck noticed a woman who look familiar – it was Dr. Erwin. “At the time I thought to myself I would love to work with her again,” Dr. Erwin said. 

As Clatterbuck started Phase 3, the medical school coincidentally paired her up with Dr. Erwin as her Obstetrics & Gynecology preceptor. 

 “Neither one of us requested each other but it just so happens that the school placed us together,” Clatterbuck said.  

The LIC shows off the beautiful part of being a physician and continuity of care, Dr. Erwin added. 

 “I love it because Carter and other students have gotten to get to know my patients and my patients have gotten to know them building trust,” Dr. Erwin said.  

Phase 3 also gives students time to explore career interests and prepare for the residency match process.  

“I think this is a great opportunity for the students to get more of a grasp of what the real-life career is before they make that next big decision for residency,” Dr. Erwin said.  

For six months, Clatterbuck learned alongside Dr. Erwin as a part of her patient care team at Andrews Women’s Hospital.  “I’ve had this amazing opportunity to continue building this relationship and now as a medical student be directly involved in patient care,” Clatterbuck said.  

Taking their passion for running off the marathon trails and into the clinic is a great way of role modeling for patients, Dr. Erwin said.  

“It’s a very important part of being a physician,” Dr. Erwin said. “It’s integrity to really live up to what you’re recommending for others.”

Dr. Erwin “is living the kind of life that I hope to have as a physician,” Clatterbuck said.  

FORT WORTH – Getting medical students’ early exposure to public health issues and how to address them can go a long way in shaping the future of health care. For one medical student at the Anne Burnett Marion School of Medicine at Texas Christian University, public health issues created by the Ebola Virus Outbreak in 2014 and HIV in West Africa is part of what inspired her journey into medicine. 

Tyra Banks, MS-1 at the Burnett School of Medicine at TCU, was born in Monrovia, Liberia, in West Africa. 

“I actually started my journey to health care through volunteering,” Banks said. “I also used to volunteer with HIV patients with my aunt.” 

At the height of the Ebola outbreak, she described how difficult it was for local health care workers to prevent the spread of the virus.  

“Everybody that had Ebola or were recovering from Ebola were all in the same area,” Banks said.  

Banks’ story paralleled with stories shared by Ikwo Oboho, M.D., ScM, Director of Infection Prevention and Control Program for U.S. Department of Veteran Affairs in North Texas, who spoke to first-year Burnett School of Medicine students.  

Dr. Oboho talked about how she’s addressed public health issues throughout her medical career.  

“Public health looks at a much bigger approach to targeting and understanding the challenges that people face in accessing health care,” Dr. Oboho said. “Also, designing strategies that will be far-reaching than just the impact of one patient it targets a population.”  

Public health is the science of protecting and improving the health of people and their communities. This work is achieved by promoting healthy lifestyles, researching disease and injury prevention, and detecting, preventing, and responding to infectious diseases, according to the Center for Disease Control (CDC) Foundation.  

Dr. Obho, was invited to campus by Ric Bonnell, M.D., Director of Service Learning at Burnett School of Medicine. Her career path in infectious diseases and public health began in her home country of Nigeria.  

“Growing up in Nigeria, I got to see a lot of infectious diseases and how it affected people,” Dr. Oboho said. “When I came to America, I wanted a specialty that allowed me to take care of the whole person and infectious diseases is one of those ways.”  

In her current role, she is the first person of African descent to hold her position as a physician and commissioned officer designated by the U.S. Public Health Service (USPHS) in North Texas. Her day-to-day work focuses on providing clinical care and infection prevention for veterans. In her discussion to the medical students, she focused on how her work on outbreak responses in Africa helped shape how she practices medicine today. 

“I knew that my passion was in HIV work, but I also wanted to learn how to analyze data,” Dr. Oboho said. 

In the early 2010s, she joined the Division of Global HIV and TB at the Centers for Disease Control and worked for the President’s Emergency Plan for AIDS Relief (PEPFAR), which focused on increasing access to HIV treatment in sub-Saharan Africa, particularly in West and Central Africa. “It’s actually the largest global initiative for any single disease,” Dr. Oboho said.  

She also worked in Republic of Côte d’Ivoire, which is on the southern coast of West Africa, during the Ebola outbreak in 2014.    

“We did a lot of preparedness,” Dr. Oboho said. “They didn’t have vaccines at that time so what we were doing was giving supportive care. Giving people intravenous (IV) infusions.” 

Dr. Oboho stressed the importance of understanding public health as the students continue their journey into medicine. The Burnett School of Medicine puts an emphasis on preparing medical students to care for patients through a public health lens with its unique service learning curriculum.   

“It helps to make you think of the patient that you’re going to take care of as a whole person,” Dr. Oboho said. 

Medical students may be fascinated with science and theory but understanding that there are other challenges that affect a patient much more than their illness is important, Dr. Oboho added.  

“If you can develop strategies to address that and reduce barriers, your patients are more likely to take that treatment you have given them,” Dr. Oboho said.  

The messaged resonated with Banks. She hopes to return to Liberia at some point in her medical career and share the knowledge she’s gained.  

“My goal is to go back to Liberia long term to provide some services because that’s home and that’s where I got my foundation,” Banks said.  “I’m very privileged to have the opportunity to study in the U.S.” 

Each year, Black History Month celebrates the contributions and influences of African Americans to the history, culture and achievements in the United States. Throughout Black History Month the Anne Burnett Marion School of Medicine at Texas Christian University will highlight some of its students, faculty and staff who will share the importance of celebrating the month, the importance of representation.

Rebecca Sobolewski, MS4, talks about what Black History Month means to her:

Alexis Higgins-Williams, MS1, talks about what Black History Month means to her:

Amber Thurman, M.Ed., Learning Specialist, shares what Black History Month means to her and how important representation is:

Jeanine Williams, MS1, talks about what Black History Month means to her:

Rebecca Lee Crumpler, MD, 1831-1895

Charles Richard Drew, MD, 1904-1950

Check out some of the great stories from TCU Magazine and TCU Endeavors by checking out the Black History Month stories section.

“I have decided to stick with love. Hate is too great a burden to bear.” – Martin Luther King, Jr.

A few years ago, I was going through a life transition. As I felt the need to really focus on the areas of my life that were changing, I decided to run an experiment. It was a digital detox of sorts. I was going to spend 30 days off all social media. That 30 days was so freeing it turned into 9 years and counting. Over these years, I have noticed some differences in day-to-day experiences between myself and those I know that use more social media, and it’s really concerning.

What I first noticed was people showing up more online than in life. There was always a possibility of something better “out there” than right here. That also revealed to me a distractibility that others describe and display that doesn’t feel as present for me. Teaching and mentoring university students for the last 6 years, I’ve also been told of, and witnessed, a general unease that many just live with all the time. In fact, in a recent study from the Harvard Graduate School of Education, 45% of young adults in the US reported a general sense that “things are falling apart”. One participant said, “I just wish I was able to calm down literally ever. I always feel on edge, everything scares me…If I could just find some way to calm down a little it would work miracles.” Most recently, I have begun to pay attention to another difference. People seem to be, and are expressing to me, being more upset, angry, even outraged. I am witnessing in my own life, good, loving people see others in their life as enemies, turn against one another, and friendliness and friendships end. What is going on?

Drs. John and Julie Gottman, clinical psychologists and researchers, are relationship experts. Through their work they have been able to predict with 93% accuracy in research settings which couples would get divorced and which ones would stay together. Considering all the behaviors and characteristics couples express, there is one destructive variable that stands out more than any other: contempt. Sadly, contempt in relationship, romantic or otherwise, is lethal and is growing all too common. What is driving contempt to be the emotion of so many relationships today? Look no further than a blend of human instincts and the ‘outrage industrial complex’.

First, what is contempt and what does it do besides destroy all our relationships? Contempt is an emotion that is in the same family as anger and disgust. Unlike anger and disgust, emotion researcher Paul Ekman finds that contempt gives us a feeling of power or status. Unfortunately for relationships of all kinds, feeling contempt contributes to feeling superior to others. I don’t need to tell you that this is not the foundation for a good relationship whether romantic, personal, or professional. Worse still, social psychological research demonstrates that it is human nature to get a whole lot wrong when it comes to questions of morality and intent. Included in a short list of findings, virtually everyone inflates their moral qualities and sense of themselves. In other words, we innately perceive ourselves to be more moral than those around us, especially those we disagree with. We believe that love and virtue drive people on our “side” and hate and immorality drive people on the “other” side. And unless we are engaged in a conscious and well-informed act of reflection, we believe that our version of reality is reality and anyone that disagrees with us is either misinformed, biased, hurtful, or out to get us. It’s these tendencies that the “outrage industrial complex” has so masterfully harnessed, and it’s moving us, unconsciously, in a bad direction.

Contempt and its breeding grounds are everywhere. Since the late aughts researchers, thinkers, writers, and advocates having been warning of the “outrage industrial complex.” Look around. Outrage is everywhere, and where there’s no outrage, outrage is directed because it’s outrageous that there is no outrage. Tired yet? Maybe the most common and insidious expression is found in all the media sources we so ravenously crave and consume. News and social media, which have been redesigned to take advantage of our most addictive and solipsistic traits and behaviors, I am looking at you. In their article, “How Contempt is Corroding Democracy”, Waleed Aly and Scott Stephens argue that “the machinery of public discourse, dominated by media and social media, is powerfully designed to manipulate, inflame and commodify our moral emotions, impelling us towards an unrestrained contempt for each other.” There’s so much more to this story, but you know this is true. Division, in group and out group, and contempt are the main course of so much of the information that shows up in our lives. And we keep going back for more, even though we don’t like it. The empirical evidence is very clear; the more you consume social media, the unhappier you are. Bottom line: emotions, feelings, and social actions are contagious, and the ubiquity of contempt is creating an enemy out of everything and everyone. And outrage and contempt are not the solution. They’ve certainly not worked for me. So, what is the solution if outrage, contempt, and hate only lead to more outrage, contempt, and hate? The answer, as unnatural as it may feel at times, is love. The question, then, is how.

Let’s return to the Gottmans. There is a great practice they ask couples to do to remedy contempt and criticism and get back to appreciation and love. Each partner is asked to carry a journal with them, and any time they feel the need to be critical, they must first write down in their journal 5 things they like about the other person. Not only does this give you the time and space to not get carried away in the initial heat of the moment, but it also directs you to think positively, see the good in the other. It reflects the first life lesson that your mom and your mom’s mom taught you, “if you don’t have anything nice to say, don’t say anything at all.” And here’s the most important part. If you are saying to yourself, I don’t know 5 things I like about the other person because I don’t know them well enough, that is precisely your problem. The solution to conflict with someone you don’t know is not to fight with them, it’s to get to know them. If you do know them well enough and you still can’t think of 5 things you like about them, you need turn your gaze from the other and back to yourself.

In his speech ‘Loving Your Enemies’, Martin Luther King Jr. directs his congregation “to love your enemies, you must begin by analyzing self… we must face the fact that an individual might dislike us because of something that we’ve done…, some personality attribute that we possess… There might be something within you that arouses the tragic hate response in the other individual.” It can be hard to see yourself as you really are. You and I, we’re not perfect, and we’re certainly not morally superior. It can also be hard to see ourselves as wrong, and yet (don’t tell my wife or my kids), we often are. This is where we may have to do what comes unnaturally to us.

I teach my students, as I have learned for myself, in situations that call for personal growth: do what comes unnaturally. Social scientist Arthur Brooks asked the Dalai Lama how to respond to contempt for your enemy. He said ‘with warmheartedness’. Martin Luther King Jr. taught to look for the good in the others. Those responses certainly come unnaturally to me. How about you? Do what comes unnaturally. Love your enemies.

But wait! What is love? My wife says it’s the flow of God’s energy, and that energy is transformative. That’s why love is the answer. That’s why all the major wisdom traditions teach it. That’s why Martin Luther King Jr says, “love is the only force capable of transforming an enemy into a friend.” And that’s why love cannot be stopped or beat, because even if you don’t experience the transformation in the other person, you can be sure that love, and loving your enemy, will transform you. Warmheartedness and love can be what comes naturally. It’s in our nature, we must reclaim it.

So, what do we do about the outrage industrial complex? You don’t have to like it. I don’t. But I also see that there are parts of it that could be used for good. You don’t have to like the things that the outrage industrial complex does or promotes. I don’t. But I see its power, and I know love’s power. So, I see potential for spreading something better, something more humane. Be the change. And social media? To be clear, in its current form, I don’t really like it, at least not what it does to me. That’s why it’s not in my life. But I am genuinely open to others liking it, using it, and being better for it. My wife seems to do really well with it. So, no, I am not advocating for banning or abstaining from social media, although you may want to try the latter even just for a short time. I am advocating for very conscious consumption of it. The charge is simple: know what you’re doing, when you’re doing it, and why, and think and act with love. And when, not if, you find yourself encountering personas and perspectives that breed more contempt than connection, do what comes unnaturally: give yourself a little time and space, ask yourself what would love do, look for, and name, the good, choose warmheartedness, and find a way to spread love, because it, too, is contagious.

Craig Keaton, PhD, LMSW

Burnett School of Medicine at TCU Director of Wellbeing